Muffin Top(ple) Monday

Hello there! My name is Amy, and I'm yet another guest blogger while Mollie is away, sunning herself on the beach and hopefully not contracting swine flu! Yikes! You can usually find me over at Just A Titch but I told Mollie I'd help her out while she is away. Like our previous lovely guest blogger, I met Mollie through our Operation Muffin Top(ple) group, a lovely group of girls trying to get skinny.

As part of my personal mission to get thinner, I signed up for a new gym. No, this isn't just a typical gym: it has classes and trainers and you have to work with other people. This, my friends, is where I've found a problem.

Pretty sure I've gone twice, and everybody hates me.

The truth is, I'd hate me too. Here's why: I'm the fat, slow kid. Don't get me wrong---I've been picked last for many a game of dodgeball and all that, seeing as how I've always been a little on the fat side and a lot on the non-atheletic side. The first day I went to the gym, my girlfriend came with me, so it wasn't so bad. She and I paired up to complete a billion arm exercises and speed wasn't an issue. The next day, this was not the case. We were expected to do Agility Drills in groups. And let me tell you what: I DRAGGED DOWN THE ENTIRE GROUP. Badly. If your team is only as strong as your weakest link, with me on your team, you are SCREWED. Big time. Everyone tried to be nice as they lapped me and gently scooted me over so they could leap over things or zig zag around cones as I huffed and puffed, but I could tell they were wondering who let the fatty in to ruin their workout.

In case you're wondering, no, I am not the *least* bit paranoid.

Still, I did my thing, and damn, I was sore afterwards. My crowning glory moment came when we were split into two large groups and had to alternate running with ab exercises. Basically, if you were crunching, you had to work until everyone came back from running a quarter mile lap.

Guess who got eye daggers as she dragged her fat ass in from that lap?

The good news is that I don't care. They can hate me as much as I want to, but I'll still be showing up, if not only to screw up their workout. And someday, when I'm thin and hot, I'm totally going to lap a fatty.