I'm sitting at my desk, going through my morning routine of checking out people.com for my daily dose of celebreality, when the little window pops up on my yahoo messenger showing that someone has requested to add me to their messenger friends.
I know I put my messenger ID on POF and Okcupid for people to be able to talk to me, but you can message someone without adding them as a friend. It's called a 'friend' for a reason. The people who are on my messenger are people I don't mind talking to on a regular or at least some what regular basis. It may just be me but I think it's kind of rude to just go adding people without asking them first if they mind.
So anyway - here's the very brief and spastic conversation that proceeded. Once again I've changed the userid to protect the privacy of the fella involved.
Overeager Boy: hey i saw you on pof i was gonna send a message but i live further than 75 miles
Overeager Boy: i am 29/m/troy,al no kids never been married
Dmpl Grl: Good morning
Overeager Boy: sorry to bother you i see you at work i hope we can tlk ltr
Overeager Boy: good morning
Dmpl Grl: no bother lol I don't actually do much "work" at work
Overeager Boy: hahaha well i sometimes go to my brothers shop but its bout to go outta business so i am lookin for other job as well
Overeager Boy: just so you know i live with my father at this time tryin to get a loan and money for a car i was goin out with a girl things didnt work out
Overeager Boy: so now i live here and my car was fallin to pieces in stopped runnin but i know this sounds bad
Overeager Boy: im a good guy
Overeager Boy: lol
Overeager Boy: i justs want someone to give all my love too
Overeager Boy: so tell me bout you
Dmpl Grl: wow slow down tiger lol
Overeager Boy: lol
Overeager Boy: coffee
Overeager Boy: lol
Overeager Boy:
Overeager Boy:
Overeager Boy: well you gonna be on i am doin laundry bout to get a shower maybe we can tlk ltr i would like tht
Dmpl Grl: I leave my messenger on while I'm at work most of the time - I'm never on after work
Overeager Boy: have a great oh
Overeager Boy: well i want to tlk to you
Overeager Boy: ahh can i call you
Overeager Boy: i live hours away from mobile i have a internet phone
reason i am askin its free
Overeager Boy: for me
Dmpl Grl: I'm sorry I don't give out my number until I've talked to someone online for quite some time
Overeager Boy: yeha thts cool i didnt mean it like tht im just gettin off of
here maybe we can tlk ltr ok take care have a great day but i have to go check clothes ttyl be good i will be back ltr cause i want to tlk and you a pretty woman
Overeager Boy:
Dmpl Grl: I think you may be just a little too hyper for me. Thank you though for the compliment. Have a good day!
Overeager Boy: no i have been up all night went with a friend to work at this motel i havent slept since sunday night but i am about to go to bed after i get a shower im sorry i didnt mean to come across tht way hopefully we can tlk ltr i have made a ass outta myself take care
Overeager Boy:
I mean seriously. Is meeting a nice, intelligent, decent, calm guy, that I'm attracted to asking too much?
My online-dating coach and self-professed One Date Wonder, Jane Wonder says that I'm not giving guys a fair chance. That maybe because of the thing with PT, I may be holding myself back.
I've gone on one date with another guy since the 'best first last date ever' with PT and while he was really nice and cute, there was just no attraction for me. He didn't talk much, was too shy and I just really wasn't into him. I've met another guy who I still talk to and will continue to be friends with, but there's no attraction with him either. There's a 3rd guy who I've been talking to in email and text, yet again -no attraction on my part.
Then there's the Persistent Puerto Rican who I'll blog about after this - but attraction or no I'm not going there!
I know everything happens for a reason, but I'm having a really hard time understanding why, after 5 years, out of all the guys I meet when I finally decide to start dating, the one I really like would have to be the one who wasn't looking for a relationship and is moving across the world in 3 weeks. :(
Sigh
1 People who coughed on a furball:
HA! Well, I'm not suggesting you date every psycho on the planet. For instance, I'd definitely warn against Overeager Boy here. That problem is not solvable, trust me.
My point is just that going out on one date with someone you're unsure about does not constitute dishonesty. Dating is about trying people on. And I think you're clinging to something you know is pointless instead of trying more new things.
(For the record, this doesn't mean continuing to date someone whom you met and know it just won't happen with already. I'm talking about taking the first date plunge more often. Even when you're not sure or feeling a little lukewarm.)
At the end of the day, I just want to see you happy. Smooches!
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