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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

When 100% just isn't quite enough

This comes from 2 math teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs experience.

Here is a little something someone sent to me that is indisputable mathematical logic. It also made me Laugh Out Loud.

This is a strictly a mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this:

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.


Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%


and


K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%


But,



A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%


And,


B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%


AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.


A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%


So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, its the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top.

2 People who coughed on a furball:

Anonymous said...

Yah, I can't stand these ridiculous corporate mottos that get used over-and-over. They were clearly invented to (a) motivate dullards and (b) sell useless corporate swag.

Some of my all time (un-) favorite, over-used corporate-speak terms/phrases:

* "Star" personality
* "rock star"
* "When can you get it up and running?"
* empowerment

Anonymous said...

lol that's clever :p